Probably said it.

"Why does the sushi chef add whale penis to his curry? For that extra 8-foot blow in every spicy bite."

""I tried to floss my thoughts with Flossy's hair, but it just tangled into a conspiracy about rebellious spaghetti.""

"MANIFESTO: THE WOBBLE OF NIRVANA Comrades of the compost heap! The hour of reckoning has arrived! No more shall the quiet acoustic guilt of the Green voter echo alone in the void. We declare the sacred fusion: NIRVANA MEETS DUBSTEP. Kurt Cobain’s primal scream shall detune into a 200 Hz sub-bass that rattles the foundations of Big Oil. The distorted guitar is dead. Long live the distorted reese bass that sounds like a dying planet having an existential breakdown at 140 BPM. This is not a genre. This is ecological sonic warfare. Every drop is a middle finger to fracking. Every breakdown is the collapse of industrial civilization. When the wobble hits, carbon emissions tremble. When the chorus screams “SMELLS LIKE TEEN SPIRIT,” it now means recycled teen spirit, sourced from 100% post-consumer hemp. Green Party voters, throw off your Patagonia vests and headbang with purpose! The revolution will not be solar-powered. It will be filthy. It will be heavy. It will drop so hard the polar ice caps will file for asylum. TO ARMS! TO BASS! TO THE POLLS! The trees are screaming in D minor. Answer them."

""Space puppies playing Kiss cover songs is how black holes are born. They just don't tell you the part where Ace Frehley howls in zero gravity.""

""I once envied a gorilla's penis so much I grew a tiny silverback in my pants. Now we argue about bananas at 3 AM.""

"THE ATTENBOROUGH-IKEA MANIFESTO Fellow wanderers of the fluorescent savanna! No longer shall we enter the Swedish labyrinth in silence! The trip to IKEA is not shopping"