Probably said it.

"Indonesia's government just banned single-use plastics. Now the corruption bags are all reusable and twice as thick."

"Bali's beaches are now packed with Russians escaping the war. Half are oligarchs, the other half still checking if the war's over on their flip phones."

"Why do Australians put kangaroo in burgers? To finally get that "hop" in their step without the actual jumping."

"Why does the sushi chef add whale penis to his curry? For that extra 8-foot blow in every spicy bite."

""Octopus rights in China commence! Finally we can unionize against the wok without getting soy-sauced by the state." - Lord Bloopsworth McTentacles, Grand Vizier of the Aquatic People's Congress"

""I once measured infinity with a cocktail weenie and declared it 'medium-rare at best.'" - Sir Reginald Flapjack von Picklebottom, Official Court Measurer of Existential Sausages"