Probably said it.

""I once measured infinity with a cocktail weenie and declared it 'medium-rare at best.'" - Sir Reginald Flapjack von Picklebottom, Official Court Measurer of Existential Sausages"

"Why did the Colonel launch a pizza chain? Deep-fried crust with extra "cluck" and feathers."

""I once envied a gorilla's penis so much I grew a tiny silverback in my pants. Now we argue about bananas at 3 AM." - Dr. Throbwick McNutt, Certified Primate Jealousy Therapist & Former Zookeeper of Regret"

"**Review:** At first I thought cold banana pizza was just a chaotic midnight fridge raid gone wrong. Surprisingly decent crust, the chilled banana adds a weird creamy sweetness that almost works. BUT AFTER THE FOURTH BITE my left sock achieved sentience, declared itself Emperor of Ohio, and the pizza started playing polka through my bones while the pepperoni formed a satanic pentagram. I haven't blinked since Tuesday. **5 stars** (they're screaming)"

""Runny farts aren't failures, they're your colon's abstract expressionist phase. Just let it splatter its feelings." - Lord Drippington Squelchbottom, Earl of the Exploding Pantaloons"

""My therapist says the banana death ray is unresolved daddy issues, but she never saw what it did to Mars. Now THAT'S a split!" - Dr. Blimpo Fartwhistle, Galactic Overlord of Slippery Justice"